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My struggle with social media

I appreciate that we have these amazing ways to connect with people. However, I am finding myself deeply unsatisfied with the experience. (I am fully aware that all forms of internet media consumption are in some way social media) I am primarily speaking of the kinds of media like Facebook, Instagram, and whatever the kids these days are up to.

I have used the internet to find out a lot of history of hair and hairdressing. I have finally had the opportunity to start my journey as an educator with Matrix. I have made connections with new friends that were only possible on the internet. I have even found some very interesting channels on YouTube that have a more historical beauty bent. I have my website and this blog, which are a nice way to connect with people and put some of my thoughts out in to the world. These are the types of things in which I enjoy the world of social media.

Where it gets problematic for me is the comparisons, the not feeling good enough, fighting the various algorithms, not getting "likes". There are many drawbacks to this world of social media. I found that I just didn't enjoy how I felt when I was just scrolling down all the news from my "friends", wasting time and only feeling like a commodity. I don't like to be dependent upon such things as "likes" and comments to gain validation. Also, I don't think that anything I have to share is going to be boosted by the algorithms, because it is fairly niche. I hope to connect with people of a similar mind, but it is difficult.

The biggest issue for me is the fact that a lot of my identity and profession is being funnelled into the online realm. I am consistently being instructed by my company to be a certain way online. As I don't have any great need to draw in new clients, I really only like to share the things that are interesting for me. I don't like being told that I need to do social media in a specific format to gain an audience or things of that nature. I find myself incredibly hostile to the situation. I like connecting with people, but I don't want to spend my time "working" on social media. I have heard so many people that you have to look at the social aspect as part of your job and schedule and all kinds of things. I don't want to do that. 

So, I find myself at a kind of crossroads, do I forego social media and try my best to create some kind of online value for me? Or do I look at social media as another part of my job? It is incredibly difficult for me, because I want to do as I do and share the parts that are potentially interesting to others, but I don't want to "have to". I may relegate social media to my weekends and not worry about it any other time.